�’s 74th Birthday Party

We are retracing the trajectory of an undefined instance. The following is assumed from available fragments, with gaps closed by predictions based on likeliness.

In 1951, P’s diary mentions something he saw whilst driving past a construction site, on February 8: “At first I had not given it particular attention, I had passed by it and only briefly glanced in its direction.” After a couple of days, however, it starts appearing in his dreams, taking a central role. P mentions an itch growing in the back of his head, constantly reminding him of the sight of it. On February 29, he returns to the construction site, he needs to see that thing again. A fence separates him and the thing, which looks more weathered than he remembered. There is nobody on the site. In fact, it looks abandoned, nothing seems to have moved since he last passed by here. He walks around the perimeter of the site, and finds a gap in the fence on the adjacent street. From close up it appears bigger than he imagined. He picks it up, wipes it clean of sand and decides to take it home.

P died in a car crash in 1953, leaving mostly everything to his only son, p, except for the thing, which he left to his daughter, l. Between 1953 and 1962, l donated it to a charity store, where in 1962 it was bought by f, owner of the w Grand Hotel. According to staff that worked there at the time, it was displayed in the lobby until 1966 or 1967, before being either binned in the trash collectors at the rear of the hotel, or given to an employee named k, who was moving to London, United Kingdom.

k moved to London to start working for the js, but unfortunately perished in a house fire, a mere three days after he had moved in and one day before he was set to start his job. The inventory mentions only sixteen items that survived the fire, including the thing and a 1967 Topps Carl Yastrzemski baseball card.

It is sold at auction for £8 and kept in the i family’s front room for at least two decades. The is adore the thing and keep it prominently displayed during this period. It is often the topic of discussion with guests. One frequent guest mentions in their diary: “W has a peculiar taste in decor. His front room proudly displays a peculiarity that I shall speak no more of.” During a burglary in 1976, it is stolen. To the delight of the is, their inventory is swiftly recovered. However, to their dismay, all of it is found at a crime scene, and held on to by the police. In 1986 they are to apply a new investigative technique that searches for unique biological matter, called DNA. Detective P tells the is it is “the future of investigation”.

Still nothing is found on the thing in question, but due to bureaucracy it is kept for longer than intended. When P contacts the i family—now just W’s children, as he himself had sadly passed away due to an accidental gunshot to an unmentioned part of the body and his wife was simply too demented—about their inventory in 1988, they take the more ‘valuable’ items, including jewellery and a taxidermied tiger’s head, one that W had shot himself, but leave the thing. Detective i gives it to his assistant, x, who, on 4 April 1988 gives it as a birthday present to her uncle, O, who is turning 74. They have a fun party.

O bins it the next day.

Installation by Amélie Mckee and Melle Nieling.

Made possible in part by a contribution from the Mondriaan Fund.